How Good Are Your Soft Skills?

Hello, dear one!

Why do some people seem to follow a lucky star, always at the right place, with the right help, and achieving what they want at the right time? 

They possess soft skills! Soft skills are hard to learn, cannot be measured, and demand conscious effort to build over the years.

In 1918, Carnegie Foundation hired Charles Riborg, who authored a research report named, A Study of Engineering Education.

The Carnegie Foundation report concluded that 85% of a person’s job success is a product of interpersonal communication, which is a soft skill. Only 15% of his/her success is the result of technical knowledge, which is hard skills. 

Among the soft skills, such as teamwork, organization, and creativity, the pinnacle award went to communication.

Does this surprise you? Over a hundred years later since the report, communication is still the number one soft skill today, and it will play a larger proportional role as the world enters into an artificial intelligence era.

The Bible story of David and Goliath revealed a secret for promotion or transformation.

For David to fight Goliath, he needed to obtain King Saul’s approval first. But at the time, David was a nobody teenager from a dysfunctional family.

For years, David lived in the wilderness as his father’s shepherd boy. All his older brothers belittled him.

Out of sight, out of mind. His father had so many sons that he forgot about David when Prophet Samuel came to look for David (1 Samuel 16). 

With his lowly background, how was David discovered and even recommended to King Saul? What was the bridge that connected David from the wilderness to King Saul’s army camp?

Here was David’s secret for his breakthrough: David was well-spoken and good at communication. And later, because of his ability to articulate his vision and entice people with his vision, he became one of the greatest leaders in the Bible.

Personal development expert Brian Tracy states that 85% of your success and happiness is from your ability to communicate with others.

I couldn’t have agreed more with my personal experiences.

During the 2020 lockdown, I decided it was a perfect time to remodel my bathrooms.

My coworker was so pleased with the company she employed that she asked me to include her company in my interviews. So I did. 

In the meeting with the company’s sales representative, I mentioned the type of shower enclosures I desired, the type of stone, the texture, the color, and the size from the ceiling to the tub. 

Somehow, this gentleman began leading me to his suggestions. Yes, he offered me the type of stone, the color, and the texture I wanted, but with a deadly twist that instantly killed the sales.

As he painted a picture of large pieces of stones with grout in between, I seethed inside. I hated grout with my heart and soul. For years, not only I had to labor myself to clean it extra hard but also spent the extra money to hire people for grout maintenance. 

What I wanted was three pieces of slab stone, from the ceiling to the tub. They would spur me to joyous heights.

Simple, right? But I couldn’t concisely articulate my wants on the spot. The more I was led to the idea of grout, the more I rambled to defend myself. The more I rambled, the more he remained in the grout zone.

Fortunately, after the visit, I deflected frustration and reflected with clarity. I eventually met a specialist who met my needs.

Can you relate to my communication challenge? 

How many times in the past have you been put on a spot, at home, at work, or in a situation, to decide quickly from your core values, speak up effectively, and transfer your thoughts to others effortlessly?

Now, let me bring you back to David’s story. Behind David’s one-time public victory defeating Goliath, he invested years in the wilderness, when no one was watching, to perfect his skill of using the sling and the rocks.

David only had one chance to pull out his rock and sling before getting killed by the giant. The rock in his hand was the perfect size, weight, shape, and texture. When he pulled the sling, it had to be the perfect aim, timing, and speed. 

David triumphed with his hard skill here, but what opened the door for his transformation was his soft skill of communication. He demonstrated harnessing in both skills.

Anything that seems easy requires hard work. Is that why people often say everything is hard before it’s easy?

The school system is designed to teach you hard skills, but your overall contentment will largely depend on your soft skills.

You have a David in you, and there will always be a Goliath challenging you at times in your life. How do you prepare yourself to defeat the giant?

Every day you spend time and energy, and they are your life. Where are you spending time now? To whom are you giving energy today? How good are your soft skills? How much time and energy will you invest in upgrading soft skills daily?

 Cheers to your soft skill leap!